How are you?
is a phatic expression (or a social formula). It is a group of words used for social reasons rather than to ask a real question
I really like the definition above. Years ago I often listen to Mr. Green, a radio talk show host, who disliked that question. I can understand his reasoning. Lets face it, you get some 50 phone calls that begin with “Hello. How are you?”
Eh, I’ve done it myself several times over the years. I find myself laughing inside whenever I ask the question or am asked the question. Lets face it the only person that requires an answer is a physician or close family, who really wants an answer.
My usual answer of late is. “I feel like I’m 18 again, until I look in the mirror in the morning.”
Now here are answers that I wish I could say and it would not be taken seriously. “My toe nail fungus is driving me nuts." or
"Dandruff flakes have to be brushed off from my clothes on an hourly basis. Not to mention the itch in my crotch is really bad. I wonder if it’s just a rash or caused by crotch crickets.”
So beware when you asked that question, you just may get an answer you didn’t expect.
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